The post was about friendship.
I have friends. Who doesn't? Ok, maybe some people don't have friends...like The Grinch, and Scrooge, and Satan, and Donald Trump. Wait...Satan and Trump are the same person. My bad.
You get my point though, right?
Years ago, I was given a nickname. My nickname-Mother T.
Reason being, because I acted a lot like the mom figure of the group of misfits I was surrounding myself with at the time and because...Sigh...I am NO nun. (It's a dumb and ironic moniker all at once, work with me)
Anyway, the person who gave me this nickname was a local musician. Someone I really did consider a friend. He was the very reason I met my son's father and really...a large part in why I have my Bubba.
Mostly because he introduced us and the rest is history.
I can barely stand my son's fathers stupid face now-but that's entirely another post.
Speaking of stupid faces, I no longer like the guy who gave me the nickname, either.
Therein lies the point of the post. False fucking friends.
Years ago, this local musician-who fancies himself to be a "local legend" (Yeah, he actually does)
He was a nice person at the time. He was genuine at the time. He was mostly good looking at the time. And he was talented. Local legend, Ugh. Ok, maybe-for some accomplishments, sure. He's been in the Peoria area music scene since he was around 16. He has been in some pretty good bands with large followings. But, truthfully...there are better out there. Many better.
Despite his ego, and chasing away many other former band members due to this ego problem (which we will delve into more here in just a bit)-he alienated a lot of people.
We all dealt with it for some reason. Reasons to this day, I am still legit baffled by.
Something happened about 10 years ago that soured me, finally. My eyes were opened pretty quickly about the type of person he really is.
The shitty, ego maniacal, false faced jerkwad he really is.
Let's just say he got a little handsy and violent with another friend when he was drunk. All because when he asked for her opinion of his new band, she was honest...
Her opinion, by the way wasn't just hers-it was also mine and many others. As a matter of fact, when he asked me the same question earlier in the night-I said pretty much the same thing my friend did. That they sounded like shit.
Not because of his guitar playing, or really any of the music-but because of the singer-who sounded akin to a warbling Quaalude popping slowed down 45 record sounding version of a David Draven wannabe (that's the singer for the band Disturbed, fyi) was there leading the charge. When I say this guy was bad, I mean...there are not enough cotton balls in the multiverse to absorb the amount of blood streaming from the audiences collective ears.
I'm not exaggerating. The guy sucked. The worst part? He thought he was great. Every posture on stage, every belting scream sounding similar to sacrificing a goat (where is Trump when we need him?), every flirtatious gesture to a front row lady.
It was really all so pathetic.
But there it was.
When I gave my opinion (much kinder than the one above) Don't sugar coat it honey, tell us how you really feel.
He shrugged me off, rudely. But, like I said...EGO. If you didn't want to know, douche-canoe-why for the love of God, did you ask?
Validation is a funny thing as they say.
What a sad, sad, little man he was...and frankly...still is.
So, when my friend was asked the same question and she kindly gave her honest opinion...he snapped. He screamed at her in front of a large group of people, embarrassing her-and even going on the defensive-berating her. Then he grabbed her, and shoved her off the stage. She fell.
He laughed at her from above, and the rest of the nasty sheep around him did as well. (baaa baaaa...it sounded so familiar)
Needless to say, I saw this from across the room, and ran over to help her.
And in turn...(pick on someone your own size, fucker) Went OFF on him.
I explained-not very nicely, I might add that I would literally fuck him UP if he ever put his hands on a woman in my presence again-let alone THIS woman, who never did anything but adore this guy, worship this guy, and help this guy. She had a crush on him for literally years, and he always dismissed her as chattel. And she always put up with it. He even went so far as to call her pathetic once because of her adoration and devotion to him. He spat on her loyalty, and repaid her by embarrassing her and putting hands on her in front of an entire audience.
NOPE.
That was enough for me.
I set him straight in front of the same group of people who had just laughed at my friend and with my finger in his face-I explained (not at all calmly) that I was done with him...and she should be too, and that unless he came back with a genuine apology to her, that we would never come to his shows again, and last but not least...that I would literally hospitalize him if he ever acted violently like that-to a friend and especially a woman. He backed away, because he's not stupid. A losery rock star wannabe, but not stupid.
I have never been to one of his "shows" since.
I have not spoken one word to him since.
My friend...not so much. She still follows him. He handed her this pseudo- apology that was neither genuine, or absolute. But, she took it and convinced herself that this was good enough.
I'm not nearly as forgiving, as you can tell. So...fuck that guy.
So, from the book of face, I see that rockstar wannabe is moving to another state to pursue a real career in music. He's almost 50 years old, by the way.
It's laughable at best.
And because he needs so badly to feel validated in his pursuits he held his own going away party. Yep. He threw his own party.
It was a reunion of sorts with many of the band mates and friends he used to play with. And a lot of these guys are still to this day, great friends of mine.
My invitation was declined, as you can imagine.
And a good number of people showed up to see him off.
Although...I can't totally be sure that they were there to secretly be happy he is leaving...or because they are sad to see him go.
I think honestly that so many people are so snowed by his fake facade face that most were sad. And this was precisely what my Facebook post was about today.
Fake, false, counterfeit, frenemies.
I can't with this.
I value those who are there, always...not just when it seems like they get some benefit from it.
But, it just goes to show you...stupid IS as stupid DOES, and sheep will be sheep.
My friend is the exception, though. And I'll explain why.
I work in absolutes.
When I am done with you, that pretty much sums it up
But, she has a kinder soul than I do. Which has helped me in many ways as well. We have always gravitated back to each other, even when I fuckered it all up-which was typical of me in my younger days.
I didn't always deserve her, truth be told. And neither does that guy.
But, if that's the way she chooses to be, probably good for me...just in case. More power to her, I say.
As for me. Nope.
Fuck that guy.
Nickname giver, baby daddy introduction giver, or not. (Which I could turn that around and say...thanks a lot douche.) But because I got my boy out of the deal, I feel like it wasn't all bad...even though baby daddy is an asshole of epic proportions.
My issue here is the people who are still so blind to this wannabe's bullshit. They only like him because they believe it gives them some sort of VIP status.
You know, because having VIP in Pekin Illinois is the creme de la creme of accomplishments. Once you get past the cloud of meth, I guess...hey...it's really somethin'
Ok, not really.
The flock mentality of some people is just the worst. And honestly probably why Satan is president. Don't blame me, I voted for Elmo. He's ticklish, you know.
Either way- I have friends. Go me.
And the friends I have have proven to be loyal and genuine. And truly care about me, and my family and my general well being. And anything less than that isn't worth it. Including that guy.
I guess I just wish that more people understood what real friendship is supposed to be about and to be careful who you surrounding yourselves with. People who suck don't get the privilege of being my pal. And everyone should be thinking the same way. Even with a big heart...you gotta shelter it sometimes, because there is always someone out there ready and willing to take advantage of it.
And as far as me...well...I have many mottos in life. But here's the one that pertains to this post especially:
"I'd rather be an honest asshole, than a well-liked liar."
Don't let the door hit you on your way out, old "friend"
XOXO,
Jadedgirl.
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